???????

When there isn't a single component of your awfully jaded life that is even near to what is decent or should I say, the "norm". Boy, you are definitely in deep and nasty shit more or less your entire life. But hey, don't feel TOO bad. I can absolutely relate to what you guys are experiencing. So I guess we can conclude that.. WE ARE NOT ALONE. Just about now, I have encountered yet another flagrant duel with an endangered specie more familiar in the name of "my-big-sister". Sheessshhh. Can't I just have one calm and peaceful week? Okay. Now enough shit about my existing oh-so-eccentric life. I am not the complaining kind. I may be (pardon for my excessive honesty) a bit off to what we are familiar with as sane. But I'm the type who simply deals with what is given. And handle it the best one can possibly could. Now sharing what's inside my big head doesn't necessarily translate into complaining, does it?

In my recent post.. Uh. As uncomfortable as it is for me to say this. But ummmm. *fidgeting with my chocolate-covered fingernails* I literally had a relapse. FYI: for new readers, I am in no way an addict or an alcoholic or whatever. I am just a simple 19 year old barely-a-woman suffering with a serious case of mestasized and pulvurized brain, heart and soul caused by nonetheless the four letter word that happens to be the universe's biggest evil. I assume I just acted a bit way too over my crazy head and slowly became too damn sure of my delusional self. And you know what the worst part is? Among all bonkers combined.. This cuckoo should have known better.

Well, I don't really know where this post is heading. And quite frankly, neither do I really care. I'm just letting my fingers flow over random letters. Letting words fly out of my unscrewed mind. But really though.. Where the hell is this going? Where am I?

It's 12:01 in the morning. And I'm here. Breathing? Yes. Alive? I highly doubt. Dead? Now we're talking.